NEVERLAND (the lost dream)

The first time I was there I walked slowly

Across the pebble pathway

The wind carried a wonderful warm scent of vanilla

Raising my head to breathe it in

Gazing at the sky

The sky a deep orange behind lavender clouds

At the end of the pathway sits a house

Surrounded by vibrant plants and flowers

Dark tree with red, pink and purple leaves

Falling gracefully on cobalt grass

I still can’t adequately describe

The feeling I felt there

As I neared the house

I could see a woman

Sitting on the front porch swing

with a child in her lap, a girl

And A young boy standing next to her

And I heard him say

“Look Mommy, it’s Daddy”

And then I woke up

dumbfounded, asking myself

Was that my wife, kids

I confused but mostly angry

Because I didn’t want to wake up

I didn’t want to leave

The second time I was there I didn’t walk

I ran

It was all the same

The vanilla scent, the soft warm wind

The colors of the sky

All of it

When I got to the porch the swing was empty

I sat and felt the smooth finish of the wood

Then I heard laughter in the back yard

I ran around the house and they were there

this time the little girl saying “Daddy”

Then I woke up

Every time I went back I tried to get closer

trying to see their faces

But I never could

I looked forward to sleep just to go back

But

The last time I was there

It was cold

Everything was black and gray

The house was empty

And then I saw him in the yard

The horned being with bloody eyes

And I knew what it meant

And I haven’t been there since

Going there was and is the reason I look forward to sleep

But I don’t get to sleep anymore

And I want to go home!

Because it’s more than just a dream

It’s MY DREAM!

And I want my dream back

It’s where I wanted to be

It’s was my Neverland

But the pirates of the night took it away from me

And I haven’t seen it again

All I have left are the nightmares

And the devils

The devils come for me every night

EVERY NIGHT

BY OSCAR TORRS LEON

REMEMBER THE DAYS

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

To watch the sunset

because we thought the light was so distant

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

Wanting to run away

Knowing we were too scared to go astray

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

Crying as we prayed

Knowing we would remember those days

Remember the days

Hey! remember the days

 

I remember the days of a youth mind lost fighting a case

For a life’s past filled with criminal ways

Just a little boy who was scared to get aids

Going through mental phases of insanity

Broken first into the streets of gang activity

Gradually saw that he was a bastard see

He shielded his eyes by envisioning a misty fantasy

Sadly the mist went away the heat got colder

Liquor and weed became my love and I always wanted to hold her

Was even more defiant as I grew to be bolder

Know that later I would be writing this down in a folder

 

I remember the days we used to watch time tick away

No cops but real robbers with guns how we played

Trade info to find a better way to get paid

Usual raids made by the police once a week

Anything you say can and will be used against you so don’t speak

Playing with the matches we couldn’t get enough of the heat

Crime was our only meal and we always wanted to eat

I was a dog on a chain with no leash

Crying like a whale that was just beached

I defied all the things that the world would teach

I was hopeless and like the heavens I couldn’t be reached

Passion was uncommon and love unheard of

The only thing usual was my intake of drugs

The slugs bursting through the air

The echoes of peoples screams

I never fantasized of bringing reality to a dream

The crying call of blood brought me to murder

The lust of jewels turned me into a burglar

So I killed my way right into sinning play

Sold my soul and stole my own life away

 

I remember the days of being a mouse running a maze

Walking with a crooked smile and manipulating face

Just a hungry cat that was looking for a chase

I got what I wanted because I fought to get it

Didn’t know what I needed because God always hid it

Walking a dying child with no fulfillment

I took too many sips from the glass and couldn’t refill it

It all evaporated into liquor bottles and rolling paper

I may have found the ark but I lost the raider

I’m not the runaway the runaway is the creator

The moment is meaningless because it always becomes later

Got a life straighten out but the mind is still bent

Praying the lord answers my cries but the lord seems to forget

Even in a world of joy and peace people will still repent

There is a cost to life but more than the cost is spent

Invading the land of the creator and what he created

Leaving this space for a comment I’d rather leave unstated

Where the individual means nothing and always getting traded

Stabbing back through my memory I can’t believe I made it

Time diffuses into scattered about spaced out events

All recorded history has no use it’s insufficient

Went from a beggar to a thriving independent

Reaching for the stars but the light seems so distant

 

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

To watch the sunset

because we thought the light was so distant

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

Wanting to run away

Knowing we were too scared to go astray

Remember the days we used to sit down afraid

Crying as we prayed

Knowing we would remember those days

Remember the days

Hey! remember the days

BY OSCAR TORRES LEON