NEVERLAND (the lost dream)

The first time I was there I walked slowly

Across the pebble pathway

The wind carried a wonderful warm scent of vanilla

Raising my head to breathe it in

Gazing at the sky

The sky a deep orange behind lavender clouds

At the end of the pathway sits a house

Surrounded by vibrant plants and flowers

Dark tree with red, pink and purple leaves

Falling gracefully on cobalt grass

I still can’t adequately describe

The feeling I felt there

As I neared the house

I could see a woman

Sitting on the front porch swing

with a child in her lap, a girl

And A young boy standing next to her

And I heard him say

“Look Mommy, it’s Daddy”

And then I woke up

dumbfounded, asking myself

Was that my wife, kids

I confused but mostly angry

Because I didn’t want to wake up

I didn’t want to leave

The second time I was there I didn’t walk

I ran

It was all the same

The vanilla scent, the soft warm wind

The colors of the sky

All of it

When I got to the porch the swing was empty

I sat and felt the smooth finish of the wood

Then I heard laughter in the back yard

I ran around the house and they were there

this time the little girl saying “Daddy”

Then I woke up

Every time I went back I tried to get closer

trying to see their faces

But I never could

I looked forward to sleep just to go back

But

The last time I was there

It was cold

Everything was black and gray

The house was empty

And then I saw him in the yard

The horned being with bloody eyes

And I knew what it meant

And I haven’t been there since

Going there was and is the reason I look forward to sleep

But I don’t get to sleep anymore

And I want to go home!

Because it’s more than just a dream

It’s MY DREAM!

And I want my dream back

It’s where I wanted to be

It’s was my Neverland

But the pirates of the night took it away from me

And I haven’t seen it again

All I have left are the nightmares

And the devils

The devils come for me every night

EVERY NIGHT

BY OSCAR TORRS LEON

WISHING FOR HEAVEN

I hate this

I wish I could be with you

I miss you

Your hug, your punch

Your tickle

I remember all the nights

We’d play fight

In the bedroom

I never thought for a second

This would be something

That would end soon

I wish you knew

All the feelings that I felt

And I dealt

With the chance

That there was nothing else

Than me loving you

And you

Not loving me

But it’s ok

I’ll keep indulging

Living in a fantasy

And keep hoping

For a dream

That’ll probably never happen

Even if I have to cry

While you

Keep on laughing

BY OSCAR TORRES LEON

RESTLESS

It was only when I slept

Where the dreams were never kept

The dreams were never meant

To be anything more

Than a dream to forget

And regret the things that are seen

Through scenes of shadow and steam

Rings of smoke and shuttering frames

The blame came from hate untamed

Views rearranged

By lost faith and cowardice

And that is when a monster

Is manifested through ignorance

But luckily

I have the strength

Tolerance and discipline

To wake up every morning

And try again

BY OSCAR TORRES LEON

DREAM DROP

What happens to a dream differed

When everything you heard

Just becomes another bunch of word

When everything she said

Makes you wish you were dead

And the bullshit, Shit! Shit!

Just echoes in your head

And I am just man

Without a wife or a plan

A horrible person

Obsessed with the hurting

Screaming and cursing

I was always burping blood

Spitting on the curtains

When I’m just burning blunt

Hooked on his own stuff

I remember all the foolish thugs

Buried because

They were unhappy with their lives

Didn’t give a fuck

About depressing times

Pressing minds to commit crimes

And so called acts of passion

When passion was never lasting

Concepts never grasped

And the reign was never passed

A mouth never gasped

At huger across the maps

And masses lay in heaps

In unjustified sleep

While their loved ones weep

Because of one man’s demented beliefs

When signs become an excuse

Of parental abuse

Costing a child’s life

The media is perfuse

Tragedy and hatred is used

To cue ratings to boost

Truths become skewed

While enticing more violence

And dreams that were once dreamt

Are over shadowed by realities of horrific events

The mind becomes tense

With tremors that shake one’s conscience

And we are once again left with silence

BY OSCAR TORRES LEON

You Were A Dream

You were a dream for what it seemed

Your eyes bled love

I always wanted flowing through me

You said you love me

And for once in my life

I believed those words

Every time we kissed

I felt lively enough to take on the world

Yelling bring it on world, give me what you got

You were a dream for what it seemed

You broke my heart

Told me that the love was a lie

Showed me

The dream was just a dream

And only that

You crippled me

Left me with a limped mind

Dwelling on false truths

Born on sick lips

You were a dream for what it seemed

You stood by me

When others walked away

Listened to me

When others covered their ears

Appreciated me for what I had to offer

Made time for me

When everyone else was busy

You made a fantasy

Seem like the only reality

You were a dream for what it seemed

You only stayed

To get closer to my friends

Only listened

To have something to laugh at later

You used me

For whatever you wanted

I’ve concluded

That growing old means

Sometimes

We have to let our dreams go

BY OSCAR TORRES LEON